Is it Time for Your Parents to Downsize?

August 15, 2023

by Jennifer Morin

Start downsizing now

March 5, 2018

You will thank yourself later

Have you thought about downsizing? Say you have a 3,000-square foot home with 3 bedrooms and it’s just the two of you rattling around in there. Or, you are the son or daughter of such a couple. Either you or your parents are in the 70s with good health and are still pretty active. Now is the perfect time to start ‘downsizing in place’.

Are you one of those people who likes to plan ahead, or do you wait until things happen to you? The former is called being proactive, the latter is reactive. As Steven R Covey so aptly put it:

We are the creative force of our life, and through our own decisions rather than our conditions, if we carefully learn to do certain things, we can accomplish those goals. ~Steven R. Covey

The time will come, sooner than you think, when you will have to make some decisions. Is it time to move yourself or your parents into a smaller home or even a retirement community? And when that time comes, will help be needed? Are you willing to spend every weekend purging 20 to 30 years’ worth of belongings? And if you are separated from your parents by distance, how is this even to be accomplished?

Now is the time to ask yourself these questions, start to plan, and start to downsize in place. Do not procrastinate!

Start downsizing today; you will thank you tomorrow!

The first step, even before contacting a real estate agent, is to contact a professional organizer or senior move manager. The good ones will be members of NAPO or SMM. I am a member of NAPO, the National Association of Professional Organizers.

A professional organizer trained in move management can help you handle every aspect of the move, from the estate sale to deciding what furniture will fit in the new, smaller residence. Most organizers will even draw you up a floor plan, showing you how it all fits together, and see to all the little details you haven’t even considered yet. It’s truly a smart ‘MOVE’ to engage an expert in this complicated and stressful time. Having someone guide you through the process and take care of the details brings great peace of mind.

Ideas to make downsizing easier:

Start with the end in mind. Motivate yourself or your parents by thinking about how nice it will be to have this project done. What will your home look like, feel like? Also, think about how much easier the move will be due to your downsizing work. *Begin with the end in mind is Steven R. Covey’s Habit 2.
Focus on what is important to them (or you).
Focus on the memories of the item, not the item itself.
Remind them (or yourself) the amount of space available in the new digs: Say to Great Aunt Tillie, ‘You are going to have one closet, not three! You can’t keep 30 pairs of high heels!’
Remember there is no Maybe pile; either you can fit it or it is time to let it go.

Also, find a way for grandkids to get involved, especially younger grandkids who are in junior high or early high school. My son Jacob was assigned a ‘heritage project’ to interview his oldest living relative, my grandmother, for a middle school project. She has had a really interesting life. (She still dyed her hair blonde well into her 70s.) My Grandmom and Jacob really connected. It was a blessing for them both. Which brings me to #6:

Help your parents see that it’s their memories and stories, not the stuff they have collected that is important in their golden years.
Go through family heirlooms and photos. What a great activity to get grandchildren involved in family history and connect them to their roots! LABEL the back of older pictures with as much information as possible. If this project is for your parents, ask them to start labeling. Even if they don’t live nearby, you can encourage them with a phone call each week. Professional organizers such as myself often have training in preserving and organizing family photos and will scan pictures so you can share memories easily.

These are all great ideas, and my challenge to you is: pick one of the actions I mentioned in this blog and do it THIS WEEK! Be proactive, like the productivity guru says! It really will pay off.

Start downsizing TODAY and you will thank YOU tomorrow!

Resources: Steven R Covey: The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. www.brainyquote.com/authors/stephen_covey

https://efficientspacesco.c.wpstage.net/services/downsizing/

https://efficientspacesco.c.wpstage.net/2014/08/stress-moving/

https://efficientspacesco.c.wpstage.net/2017/09/good-advice-letting-downsize/

by Jenny Morin

Good advice for letting go as you downsize

September 19, 2017

8 Great tips to Let Go

I recently spoke at a senior fair about downsizing. When I asked everyone ‘what is the hardest thing about downsizing?’ many answered: the memories. Another reply that resonated: the decisions.

When downsizing is a must, the time to let go of some memories has come. I know a lot of clients who save things from their children’s childhood and high school years. This is a burden for most parents, because it sometimes fills an entire room in their home.

Other times, the mementos that get saved are family heirlooms like furniture, quilts, and photos.

It is difficult for most of us to let go of possessions which stir memories. I think some of us grow more sentimental as the years pass. I know it’s hard, but sometimes has to be done, especially if you need to move to a smaller place. To make it easier, I have some advice that has helped my clients.

How to let go

Ask yourself: ‘Why am I keeping this? Does it mean anything to me?’
Ask yourself: ‘Do I use it?’
Ask yourself: ‘Do I love it?’ And if so, do you display it somewhere so you can enjoy it, or is it packed away in a box? If you don’t use it or love it, let it go.

From a recent article, Organizer Jodie Watson shares her favorite trick. “In any given category, let’s say artwork that you have hung on the wall, ask this question, ‘If I could only take three pieces with me, which three would they be?’ With books, the question might be, ‘If I can only take 20 with me, which 20 would they be?’ This will help you discover the ones that are more meaningful than the others. These are the ones to take with you, the rest are negotiable.” (Watson owns Supreme Organization)*

Be ruthless, not reckless. This means getting rid of all the paraphernalia from a craft you don’t do any more. Or, be ruthless by getting rid of ALL your old magazines. An example of being reckless would be to get rid of an entire box full of things without quickly looking through it. There might be money or a piece of jewelry inside. One of my clients found a check for 300 dollars in a box of old mail and magazines!
Stop saving things for children or grandchildren. You are not the family’s storage unit! Plan ahead by asking children what they would like to have from their mementos and your house. Then you know you can let go of the rest of their stuff, because it is not important to them. Box up what they want and ship it to them, or give them a few months to come and get larger items.
Let go of gifts from others that aren’t bringing you enjoyment. It’s hard to do sometimes. But just because someone gave you a gift doesn’t mean you need to keep it forever. Ask yourself, ‘Does this have a future with me?’ Remember the love is in the giving; you received it with gratitude, and enjoyed it but don’t need it any more. Your friend wouldn’t want you to be burdened with toting around that gift for the rest of your life!
Make it easier to let go by having a favorite charity or thrift store to donate to. Many hospitals run a thrift store, and the Gospel Rescue Mission helps people get back on their feet. Picture someone enjoying those shoes or that extra winter coat you don’t need any more! Visualizing this will be very helpful when you are letting go. And don’t forget to get a receipt when you donate. It is helpful to jot down a quick description of what you’re donating so at tax time you can get an estimate of the value. For example, I usually state how many bags of clothing I donate, and mention larger items specifically.
Get help. If you find you want to keep everything, here’s a great trick. Invite a friend to come over and help you. Have them hold the item, then you decide by just looking at it whether you will keep it or let it go. Many times, touching an object like a book or a sweater will cause you to feel more attached to it.

If you’ve tried these ideas and you’re still having a hard time letting go, this means you are “stuck”. It is a good time to look into hiring a professional organizer to help you. Organizers are skilled in helping people come to decisions that they will be happy with. Downsizing is much easier and less stressful with a professional to guide and assist you. You may even start to enjoy it!

Good things to keep:

Important documents like deeds, wills, medical records, birth and death records, marriage licenses, divorce decrees, social security cards, pension plan docs, insurance policies, passports, power of attorney docs, investment records, education records, genealogy records, diplomas, military service records and vehicle titles.
Family photos. Keep antique photos, and if you have mountains of family snapshots, scan them and keep them on your computer and on a backup disk.
Basic kitchen supplies.
Emergency supplies like first aid kits, an extra blanket for the car, etc.
Journals and a reasonable number of favorite books.

*Resources:

http://www.housebeautiful.com/lifestyle/organizing-tips/advice/a3173/never-throw-out-when-downsizing/

link to Jodie Watson’s webpage: http://www.supremeorganization.com/wordpress1/

by Jenny Morin

Pack ‘em up and move ‘em out!

March 24, 2017

We are leaving for Disney early next week, and I have some tips for packing up a family for a road trip or flight to somewhere warm and sunny!

I have different lists depending on the destination and time of year. For Spring break, I figure most families are going somewhere warm like Mexico or Southern California, so I’ll go with that.

Tips to make Packing for family vacation easier:

A day or two before the trip, catch up on laundry and make sure all the clothes you want to bring are clean.
The day before, go shopping for any special trip food/supplies you need.
Sit down and make a comprehensive list of everything you think you might need. If you’re going on a road trip, you can bring a lot more than if you are flying.
Check out this link for the Fly Lady packing list. This is a comprehensive list of everything you might need on vacation. What I did was copy it, personalize it to me by taking out the items I don’t need. My list is at the end of this post.
Moms: pack for yourself first. At least pick out your clothes, lay them out on the bed and pack your ditty bag with all your toiletries. Then your mind will be more clear to pack the rest of the family.
Make a “kid list” so each child over 5 can pack their own things. Before my kids could read, I would make them a list with pictures. 4 shorts with a picture of shorts, and 4 t-shirts with a drawing of a T-shirt, and so on. I’d have them put their clothes on the bed then we would go through them together so I could make sure everything was clean! (At least we started out with clean clothes, right?) The fly lady has a printable list on her site. http://www.flylady.net/i/pdf/packing_coj.pdf
Ask one of your older, organized kids to pack the food for the road trip, (or snacks for the plane) according to a list you provide. That way, you just have to answer questions about amounts, etc. Don’t forget water!
Ask your husband/wife to gather the sports equipment, camping supplies, whatever they are comfortable with packing. One job my husband loves to do is actually pack the back of the van as tightly as possible. It’s like a fun challenge for him to see if he can fit everything without it falling out when we open the back hatch.
Emergency supplies: One thing easily forgotten, but when you need it, you need it! For plane rides, I usually bring antibiotic ointment, bandaids, ibuprofen and Dramamine. If you are on a road trip, a bigger first-aid kit is a good idea, with an instant ice-pack, ace bandage, large bandages, moleskin, a bandanna, safety pins, etc.
Don’t forget your dressy clothes! And your dress shoes—I don’t know how many times I brought my dress but forgot heels! A great tip for families with young children: put all the family’s dress clothes into one duffel bag so the kids don’t wrinkle them up while rifling through their bags for other clothes.

Fun day-trip destinations on the West Coast:

Try out horseback riding on Bandon beach. I went last year, and as long as you can pick your day (wait for sun!) it is a lot of fun. http://thebandonguide.com/horseback-riding-on-the-beach
How about crabbing? The Oregon coast is a great place to try crabbing as a family, then enjoy the catch of the day! bestfishinginamerica.com/or-crabbing-bays-in-oregon.html
Hike to a waterfall. In springtime, the waterfalls are amazing. Be prepared to get wet! http://www.oregonlive.com/travel/index.ssf/2015/04/oregons_best_waterfalls_for_sp.html
Try out Bend for a couple days. Ski Mt. Bachelor and check out the artsy downtown area loaded with good restaurants and some music venues on weekends. For families that don’t ski, the lava tube caves are a great way to get underground. You can literally walk fully upright in the lava tubes for a mile! I’ve done this with my family and we loved it. Definitely the biggest cave I had been to. No claustrophobia at all!
Easy day trip in Southern Oregon: The Oregon Caves. The temperature stays pretty even year-round. About 50 degrees. These caves are made of marble, and are loaded with stalactites and stalagmites. It’s a must-see if you live in the area. https://www.nps.gov/ORCA/planyourvisit/index.htm
Mammoth Beach, CA. Imagine the Swiss Alps transported to California. This is what Mammoth looks like! It’s a great choice for a couple days of skiing. Snowshoeing and natural hot-springs are other adventures to be had in this beautiful spot. http://www.sunset.com/travel/family-vacation-ideas

My adapted Fly-lady packing list:

A couple weeks before the trip: ask neighbor to bring in recycling, newspaper and mail, and arrange pet care.

CLOTHES

____changes of clothes in carry on chargers
____sets of underwear (underpants, socks)
____sleep shirts/pjs laptop, charger
____dress outfits (pantyhose/tights)
____shoes (sneakers, sandals, dress, slippers, boots)
____robes (swim cover ups)
____special sports wear (tennis, golf, skiing)
____swimsuits
____swim towels
____goggles,
____sweaters, sweatshirts
____jackets or raincoats
____ dress shoes

TOILETRIES

____toothbrushes
____toothpaste
____deodorant
____hairbrush, comb
____shampoo
____kids’ shampoo
____ elastics
____lotion
____bugspray
____sun block
____medications
____nailfile
____shaving kit
____make up bag
____nail clippers
____Super absorbent hair towel
____ candle, matches
___ Mom nightstand bag
Mom toiletries: ___Pillow ___Mp3 ___mask ___toothbrush charger ___nail clippers ____shaving kit ___medicines ____makeup ___vitamins

MISC

__Money belts ____passport copies

____sleeping bags
____cell phone, cord,
____chargers
____MP3 CHARGER
___ CAMERA, charger
____ Camcorder, charger
____Pillows, u-shaped pillows
____books, magazines
____stamps, pen, paper
____sporting equipment:
____map(s) , directions
____RESERVATION FORMS, RESERVATION #
____resort information

- MOVIES
- ____GAMES
- ____extra batteries

LAST MINUTE

____feed, water pet
____turn on porch light, set timers
____water plants
____check doors, all appliances off
____turn down heat/air conditioning
- ____large garbage bags for dirty clothes

Kids: Special blankets or stuffed animal ___ Books____

Activities for plane ride

Something to draw with. Colored pencils or crayons.
Notebook
Erasers, pencils
Candy, snacks
Juice boxes

Other:

Hats, sunglasses

Voice recorder

Journal/notebook

First aid kit

Book lights

Playing cards

Plane survival kit:

Gum, eye drops, Mask, comfy pants, earplugs, mp3, headphones, book, handicraft, Compression socks and foot rest, seat cushions, light blanket

by Jenny Morin

Is it Time for Your Parents to Downsize?

Start downsizing now

You will thank yourself later

We are the creative force of our life, and through our own decisions rather than our conditions, if we carefully learn to do certain things, we can accomplish those goals. ~Steven R. Covey

Start downsizing today; you will thank you tomorrow!

Ideas to make downsizing easier:

Start downsizing TODAY and you will thank YOU tomorrow!

Good advice for letting go as you downsize

8 Great tips to Let Go

How to let go

Good things to keep:

*Resources:

Pack ‘em up and move ‘em out!

Tips to make Packing for family vacation easier:

Fun day-trip destinations on the West Coast:

My adapted Fly-lady packing list:

Plane survival kit:

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